Since I have some extra time I wanted to be sure and share something God sent my way Sunday. You see, Sunday was a hard day emotionally. I cried a lot and even blogged about it. I prayed a lot. I read my scriptures and then picked up this month’s Ensign magazine.
And that’s when God spoke directly to me.
I browsed a few articles and began to read Recognizing God’s Hand in Our Daily Blessings by Elder D. Todd Christofferson of the Quorum of the 12 Apostles. After reminding readers of the example of prayer Christ gave in Luke 11:2-4 Elder Christofferson focuses in on the phrase “Give us this day our daily bread” he says:
“We all have needs each day for which we turn to our Heavenly Father. For some, it is quite literally bread—that is, the food needed to sustain life that day. It could also be spiritual and physical strength to deal with one more day of chronic illness or a painfully slow rehabilitation. In other cases it may be a less tangible need, such as something related to one’s obligations or activities that day—teaching a lesson or taking a test, for example.
Jesus teaches us, His disciples, that we should look to God each day for the bread—the help and sustenance—we require that particular day.”
I kept reading, still not really feeling deeply about the message, just reading. He recites the time of Israel’s exodus and wandering in the wilderness where they quite literally depended upon the daily gift of manna for food. He tells of personal experiences he and his family have had to rely daily for the Lord’s help. Here is where God grabbed my attention:
“Asking God for our daily bread rather than our weekly, monthly, or yearly bread is also a way for us to focus on the smaller, more manageable bits of a problem . . . Sometimes all we can handle is one day—or even just part of one day—at a time.”
Here I was, overwhelmed and in tears yet again at the things coming ahead, when all God wanted me to do and all He was offering was enough strength, physical and emotional, to get through that day. I remembered the scripture in Matthew 6: “Take therefore no thought for the morrow: for the morrow shall take thought for the things of itself. Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof.”
I was overwhelmed because I lost my focus. I can’t do anything about tomorrow in this situation. God had my attention and to drive home his point the very next part of the article shared Elder Christofferson’s mother’s experience. After a radical cancer surgery followed by painful radiation she told her mother one day:
‘Oh, Mother, I can’t stand having 16 more of those treatments.’
“She said, ‘Can you go today?’
“‘Well, honey, that’s all you have to do today.’
I got the point. God was right there helping me through that day. It was my job to keep my focus on the day I was in, trusting Him for the daily bread I would need anew each morning. I woke up this morning and remembered that lesson. I prayed and asked God for help and strength to just get through today.
Wouldn’t you know He wanted to be sure I had learned my lesson? I mentioned briefly in this post that the morning at the hospital was eventful. Here’s what happened:
We arrive early for our amniocentesis to check on Mason’s lungs. They draw the fluid out with a rather long needle and no numbing, hook me up to a monitor to see how the baby reacts while we wait for results, which will take an hour. I also get a shot of Rhogam in my hip because of my blood type. Oh joy.
Time passes and my nurse and surgeon come in. The one and only machine in the entire hospital that can run the test on my amniotic fluid has broken. Of course. My fluid sample is being driven to another hospital in the city whose machine is working, where the test will take a full hour, once the sample gets there. My c-section time is now getting bumped to around noon.
My husband and I go get two grandpas who are waiting patiently up by the NICU. They’ve come to help Jason give Mason a priesthood blessing before he transfers to Children’s for surgery. They’ve been there for a long time already. We all go to the cafeteria to wait, me still not allowed to eat or drink because I’m having surgery in a few hours.
We wait until after 11am then get a phone call to come see my doctor. A walk across the hospital while the grandfathers head back up to their waiting room. Then we find out the results – Mason’s lungs need more time and help to develop enough for a safe delivery. C-section is cancelled, new plan in place: Steroid shots to develop Mason’s lungs and a new c-section date of Wednesday. No amnio this time, just straight to surgery.
Grandfathers get to go home. Jason and I head back to the cafeteria and I get to eat while we wait for a special steroid shot to be readied. When that is finally done I get the steroid shot in my other hip(ouch!), doctor’s orders on a slip for the hospital in my town to repeat the steroid shot tomorrow (saving me 2 hours of driving), and we head home.
The neurosurgical team is notified that Mason won’t be here for a few days yet. Ronald McDonald House reschedules our stay for the new delivery.
See what I mean about an eventful morning???
However, unlike yesterday, I wasn’t distressed (disappointed, yes). God gave me just enough daily bread to get through today with peace. He gently reminded me Mason is coming in His time and at the right time. Today. That’s all He asks me to look at, to get through, and He is right there with me through every moment.
I am blessed.